Another New Decision

My 2 weeks vacation to Japan was awesome and I feel very grateful for it. It has it's ups and down moment but overall everything was great. I was able to see Sakura flowers from early opening, full bloom, into their falling moment. It's really beautiful.

Nagano, Niigata, and Sendai are also amazing. I never seen alps and mountains so beautiful in my whole life. The only regret is that we only spent 1 night for each town because we will need 2 nights to be satisfied in each town.

But the happy moment is over. We go back home and have to deal with another blow. The election result is awful. If only it's not about religion and race that contaminated this election really bad, I won't be this hopeless. I feel like there will be no place for me to be treated fair and square, and the rise of religion-fascist movement in this nation really makes me scared. Even until now I still feel awful.

Thinking that everything will be alright and the next governor won't be that bad will be just a denial thought and I won't even hope for that. I have loss all my respect, only bitterness left for this candidate, ever since January this year. So I won't hope anything for him. If I will be proved wrong than that's great but I won't pray he will be failed or succeed. Hoping anything good will come from him will only hurt me.

I've decided to try to get scholarship for master degree abroad. I will spend this year to hone my language and drawing skill. Next year, I'll apply for IELTS and scholarship program. The next two years will be the only time I can get scholarship. So at least I will try my best to achieve my dream. I hope I can still be able to apply JLPT test this year.

My burnout seems to be recovering pretty much and I can manage my emotions better. So I might not post often in this blog page. But I guess that's a good sign.